Tuesday, April 28, 2009

The Sacrifice that is Motherhood

I was conversing with a friend a couple of weeks ago who asked me how Motherhood was going. I told her "Great. It is well worth the sacrifice." My friend said, "See, I wouldn't think it is a sacrifice. At least not for me - I know you wanted to have a career but I want to stay home." Later I realized my friend mistakenly assumed I was speaking only of my career and the monetary sacrifice. If I had been a little sharper at the time I would have told her what I really meant:

1. First, there is pregnancy. There goes your hormones, sanity, and body.
2. Then your mind goes - I literally forgot to finish a take-home portion of an exam once.
3. After you have the baby you foolishly think your body will be back to normal. HAHAHAHA!
4. Forget dates with your husband, doing anything past 8pm (cuz you'll be exhausted), or leaving the house by yourself for longer than 2 hours if you are nursing.
5. And speaking of leaving the house it now takes 10 times as long to get out the door even though it is just one child.
6. Sex is pretty much nonexistent for at least a little bit.
7. Going to the bathroom by yourself - especially when they become mobile - is a thing of the past. My son's latest thing is to come in and put his head on my knee while I'm trying to complete my business.
8. Showers - ummm, yes, I think I remember those. Even if you do get one in you take it so fast that halfway through the day you can't remember if you've taken a shower that day or not. And is that really bad dandruff or did I just forget to rinse my hair out?
9. Then there is the whole "baby proof your house" which will really never be baby proof because babies are smart little creatures who figure things out way too fast for your own good.
10. And the reason why I wasn't able to respond to my friend at the time was because I was completely exhausted and was sneaking in some computer time while he blessedly took a nap.


  1. it doesn't get any better when the kids get older. KeLei doesn't see why she can't go with us on date night. They still like to come into the bathroom and talk. I still get messed up with names, and we won't even talk about the laundry that seems to multiply as the kids get older. Aaaah yes, having children is a little bit of a sacrifice, but it is worth it....some of the time. :) MOM

  2. say it like it is, sista! ;)

    It gets harder w/each kid you add, but definitely increasingly worth it too.

    Does that make sense? Sorry, I'm exhausted...blame it in the motherhood thing :P

  3. I hear you! Truly, the sacrifice is the sacrifice of the whole self. EVERYTHING changes. But, it is worth it...I hope!

  4. Wow, I needed to read this TODAY of all days! I'm actually embarrassed at home many time a week (okay okay, a DAY) I ask myself "why am I doing this again? what is the point" and sometimes my untamed temper answers "because you were sent to be miserable for the rest of your stinking life"...and then, just when I need it most, one of the stinkers does something ridiculously sweet (and along the lines of what I've been trying to teach them) and a glimmer of hope rises up. All is not lost in this, but some days finding the "worth" in it...can be like searching for a needle in a haystack.

    Thanks, now my breathing has returned to normal!

    Ps I totally enjoyed the RESPECT post too! how very right indeed. I'm suprise at how common it is to have had sexual relations BEFORE marriage nowadays???? CRAZY! and to top it all off...they are the ones who think WE are crazy for abstaining...topsy turvy world i tell ya!